Pokerhaus

Even though I was diagnosed with bipolar and have suffered with depression for about 8 years minimum on and off I subscibe to the line of thinking that bipolar is more of an excuse for people than an actual illness.  I know some people must really suffer from this but if I can take all the shit that I've gone through and turn it around and be successful I am sure most people can.  You either wallow in self pity or you pick yourself up and handle your business. Remember struggle and pain from our past helps make us who we are today so you can take it negatively (which I know you don't since your one of the most positive people I have ever semi-known) or it motivates you to overcome the setbacks and prove people wrong but it's really about proving yourself wrong. You are an amazing poker player and a hell of a guy all you need to do is focus on your goals and surround yourself with positive people and energy and things have a funny way of working out.  I feel like I have gone from severe depression to on top of the world and I am sure you can/will do the same! Remember:
Nobody asked for life to deal us
With these bullshit hands with doubt
We have to take these cards ourselves
And flip them, don't expect no help
Now I could have either just
Sat on my ass and pissed and moaned
But take this situation in which I'm placed in
And get up and get my own


Im at work so I kind of just whipped this together one thing I do know about is bipolar and depression but I think you or anyone as a person needs to be strong enough to pull yourself out of it.  Hope this makes sense and  I dont sound like a jerk. Good day and goodluck bumbo your a beast this is just a phase that will make you stronger and add to your character.

^^^^ agri 100%, keep grinding it out man, just like "teh pokers" as you would say, keep a positive attitude at work and give it 100% and just re-evaluate after a lil bit, your a beast so im sure youll be alright mang

glgl

Echo bharper's post.  Except I wouldn't call it karma as I think of that as some intangible connection between actions and results.  Take care of yourself and give good efforts in everything you do in a time like that, and you'll naturally move towards the situation you want.  That's just how it works.

And ofc,

GMJ wrote:

Gl dude, hope you get everything worked out.

Thx for teh support all.  You know I like to find the sunshine in the clouds so I know things will be fine.

Today, the first day was interesting all seemed ok on the surface but I felt something brewing behind the scenes.

I had a meeting with the HR director who informed me that any recurring doctors visits that I might need to attend would have to be done on my own time and not during business hours.  I foound this to be strannge and I have to look into the legality of somthing like this before I consent.

Additionally, I have worked with one doctor and I'm not about to change now I need to keep a flow of care going here; his hours are like 9-6 so its a ghey spot, I kinda feel like I got check shoved holding top set on a 4 str8 board but I gotta call anyway and prray, lol.  I am confident it will work out well, however, we shall see.

Bumboklaat wrote:

Thx for teh support all.  You know I like to find the sunshine in the clouds so I know things will be fine.

Today, the first day was interesting all seemed ok on the surface but I felt something brewing behind the scenes.

I had a meeting with the HR director who informed me that any recurring doctors visits that I might need to attend would have to be done on my own time and not during business hours.  I foound this to be strannge and I have to look into the legality of somthing like this before I consent.

Additionally, I have worked with one doctor and I'm not about to change now I need to keep a flow of care going here; his hours are like 9-6 so its a ghey spot, I kinda feel like I got check shoved holding top set on a 4 str8 board but I gotta call anyway and prray, lol.  I am confident it will work out well, however, we shall see.

GLGL Bumbo, obv we are all cheering for you on this!

Hopefully this turns out well for you mr. Bumbo!

Good luck Bumbo. You've provided me with a lot of inspiration since you owned me and I started talking to you, and I wish you nothing but the best.

i love bumbo

Peasac7 wrote:

bumbo, fwp: what's it like? My bro looks like he's going to be diagnosed with that and i was just wondering if you could offer any insight as to how I should behave around him and what I can do to make things easier for someone dealing with that kinda thing.

Peasac, it is hell until you get your meds str8.

I have been dealing with this for 6 months now and I'm still trying to get the right "cocktail".

Long story short:

- The doctor put me on one of the most addictive and potent drugs on the market at a high dose which made me a zombie.  I just couldn't think, let alone work or play poker.

- I noticed I was fuckedup and asked to be taken off the med, he told me to take 1/2 the dose.

- The doctor gave me COMPLETELY WRONG INFORMATION ON HOW TO WITHDRAW FROM BENZODIAZEPAMS and I have been through the most hellish elongated withdrawl you can imagine.

- I am now on 1/2 the dose of that fucking shit (KLONOPIN) and seem to FINALLY be stable after 5 weeks of nightmarish withdrawl (withdrawl is long due to the long 1/2 life of Klonopin 35-100 hrs to metablolize 1/2 of a dose).

- I will have to get off Klonopin completely to "get back to normal" which means another period of withdrawl, tho I expect this one to be much less severe I will taper the diminishing doses really slowly, I may not even have withdrawl (PLEASE DEAR GOD)

- Now that I am gettin my mind back, I am going to EAT ONLINE POKER FOR EVERY MEAL!

- Srry I haven't been around, I have been thourgh hell and back and didn't want to share the bad/negative times with you, my friends.

<3

me



PS:  See ya in VEGAS bishes!!!!

Last edited by Bumboklaat (04-05-10 12:46:26)

Bumboklaat wrote:

Found out I'm bipolar 3 months ago, and took a medical leave from work to get things right and still dont have the meds right.   Its why u only see me on/playing sometimes lately cause if I don't feel good I don't wanna/can't play.

The great thing about the insurance industry is that the way it is set up I either have to go back to work tomorrow, forfeit my job (be fired for not showing up) or be declared long term disabled.  Now, I didn't get the full lowdown on the details of longterm but it sounds like u are declared legally disabled and cannot work again, my doctor advised me against this. So, its likeok ur better go back to work, oh, wait - ur not, wat???

My sleep schedule is beyond F'dup, and tho it can be controlled for swings of time I just dont operate on a 9-5 schedule mentally/emotionally anymore, tho I hope that when I can find the right combo of meds this will be possible.

I'm gonna give it an honest shot and attempt to perform, but if it doesn't workout I know I will be ok no matter what.  i am planning my anticipated next movesobv, etc. based on how thngs go.

I guess I put this up here cause its 2:30 and I hafta be at work in 6 hrs, lol, and I'm kinda wigging hard a little and I prolly cant take enough xanax to chill tehf out, lolzzz.

Yeah whatever I know most ppl wouldn't put this shit on a public forum but I trust you guys, I guess I don't give a F, and I had to get it out.  Also Im sure a lot of you guys can relate to the screwedup sleep schedule thing.  Thx for ur suppport all.

Found out I'm bipolar 15 years ago, got sent to DSS and other agencies so they could force me to get my meds right but i refused...

The great thing about life is you can get help from the government, tax payers, friends, family many diff ways or just handle your business and take the negativity in a way that makes you unique.. I find I have very little "real" sympathy for anyone because shit that i been through is alot (more than most) and as far as strength does im diesel...

My sleep schedule is what I want it to be.. all natural is the way to go you dont wanna rely on meds.. .

I'm gonna be a man and continue dealing with my past, my mistakes, my failures, the things i couldnt control, the things I could, my family history and use it as the opposite of what would make me depressed its motivation...

I guess I put this up here cause its 2:15am and bipolar is real and shits been tough but the strong survive the weak shall bitch...

Yeah whatever I know most ppl wouldn't put this shit on a public forum but  I guess I don't give a F, i got plenty of money and I believe without most things in my past happening i wouldnt be where I am and I wanted to post this...


I am more than willing to engage in a sensible conversation about this topic or answer any inquiries  since Ive was diagnosed with it 15 years ago before shit got even more wild after that but i fear negative responses will follow and im kinda drunk anyway......

Now only the weak speak about the struggle the strong focus on the overcoming......

Dont mean to be offensive just say what I feel..  I mean again I was diagnosed 15 yrs ago, went through things that would make me spiral even further downwards since then, never took meds, and i overcame because of the struggle because of inner strength..

i dont care who flames but most will be misinformed..